Being posted to a remote district was not as tough as expected. If we had survived Manipal, India back in medical school, we could adapt to any living conditions. Comparatively, Karling faces more hardship during her on-calls at district hospital(secondary health care) while I work 8-5 at the district's primary health care center. To "compensate" for that I sought locum job out of town after office hour, even on weekends.
Mami must have had some unfulfilled cravings during pregnancy, because Nana salivates a lot.
Maybe Mami had some unfulfilled cravings for me.
Lets talk about the living conditions first. Before we reported we had an option of staying either in the hospital apartment or the district clinic quarters. The latter was a double-storey dilapidated bungalow, with rusted iron door and window grills; termite nests infested, which has been abandoned for years. The warden made no effort of returning it to its former glory. Needless to say we rented one unit of the hospital apartment while not subletting any rooms, so that it would be convenient for our family to come visit and stay (Yes, rented, got conned by our own employer).
Coincidentally it was the 2nd day of Ramadan month. So we got to mingle with the town folks at the Ramadan baazar (night market) while buying dinner. I supposed the people there rarely get Chinese outsiders judging by the way some kids were staring at us.
Sorry mate, you don't bring anything to the table, you gotta go, and that's life.
The simple and friendly folks at the primary health care.
Lots of Malay eateries around, with 1 particular restaurant selling Western food. There were scattered small grocery stalls and a Giant-style single storey hypermarket selling halal meat and fresh vegetables. For pork or Chinese eateries, one has to travel to Kampung Mahsan or Bahau, which are 8km & 12km away respectively. By the 2nd week, Karling had started cooking and we were eating home-cooked food. Po po's well chartered arrival too helped us to a smooth transition.
Every morning I would send Nana to her babysitter at Kampung Mahsan. The 1st time dropping her there I was concerned whether Nana would be neglected or given sub-standard proper care. We were promised at least 2 feedings of porridge daily with our formula milk to top it up. Putting Nana in the hands of a total stranger with no prior babysitting experience albeit having 4 grown-up children herself, I had unpleasant scenarios crossing my mind every now and then.
What if she fell from a chair and landed on her head? What if she was abused? What if the house was robbed and she was kidnapped? I was so relieved to see Nana smiling every evening I go to fetch her. Eventually I grew in confidence with the babysitter as every aspect of Nana worked out fine.
Po po came to visit and cooked for us. Nothing like mother's home-cooked food.
Oh boy, oh boy, Papa did you come to bring me back?
Nana always found it hard to be part of a group photo.
By the 3rd week in BSJ, we were missing our 3 months old Peter. As the grandparents were travelling to Port Dickson to visit tai ma, another great-grandma (we have 4), I decided to rendezvous with them, bringing Nana along as Mami was on-call that weekend. Peter was excited to see me, I supposed he still recognized me, letting me carry him and play with him. And yea his hair has grown a little, especially the top center part which stuck out like a bunch of wild bush.
With the new baby Peter and Nana around, Tai ma was joyfully entertained and delighted. Naturally old folks like babies alot. On the other hand Gong gong and po po were both visibly worn out, as Peter obviously was a handful, constantly keeping the old folks on their feet, giving them countless sleepless nights.
Gong gong, faster pull me up so I can stand.
Tai ma (great grandma) sure enjoy seeing little babies in the house, I hope she doesn't eat me.
On the bright side, Peter and his grandparents has grown quite fond of each other within this short time. Po po acquired a better understanding than me towards his biological clock and pattern of needs. As promised I took few pictures of Peter to show Mami later. I can't possibly imagine what Mami felt and thought about being separated from her new infant son of 3months old.
Perhaps she was too overwhelmed by the intensity of guarding the whole emergency department by herself during every oncall, not to mention the trips she has to make to Hosp. Seremban to accompany ill unstable patients. The whole process of transporting patient, passing over the case, running a CT scan then traveling back takes about 4 hrs. Despite all these, we were both looking forward to the day we'll be reunited with Peter for good, by bringing him over to BSJ...
Front door to our future home, just..not yet.
Mami sure knew how to make papa happy.
Come September 2011, Hari Raya celebration had just toned down. By this time Peter was 4mnths old, and his 15mnths elder sister was 19mnths old. On this particular Saturday Papa just turned 27. And what was this "old" father of 2 doing on his birthday? Working locum at Kuala Pilah. The property in Seremban has received its certificate of fitness and our new home house key has came to our possession. For renovation work to commence, papa had to gather funds in order to move in the family. It wasn't rocket science but it wasn't easy either.
During the one hour lunch break Mami brought along Nana to give papa a surprise visit. We had a mini-celebration at the local KFC branch. Nana looked so much more matured than her age, being adorned in a flowery dress and a matching hairband. She was good enough for my birthday present, I wouldn't ask for anything better. And seeing her licking clean her chocolate sundae cup, rolled back the years to a time when Mum brought me and my brothers for ice-creams at our home-based McD.
My daughter and I, she looked so mature in her dress and hair band.
Papa, where's my present, today is birthday right?
Typical work at my primary health centre starts at 8am. Patients will already be waiting, especially the ones that couldn't or wouldn't go to work, dropped by either to try their luck or demand for medical certificates. There are those who knows no shame or self dignity by even asking for extension of the MC. Oh well, me and my colleagues all had our fair share of hostile encounters with these unreasonable folks, and over my dead body I would never give in.
There were 5 of us, running outpatient, maternity and child health department. On certain days we have Tuberculosis clinic, attend courses, give out health talks at schools or community centres, and rarely cover for shortage in manpower at other district primary health care. Per day we could easily attend to 200 patients, ranging from minor ailments (cough&cold), diabetes & hypertension in pregnancy, to suspected dengue or leptospirosis. The one thing I enjoy there is the tea time with banana fickles(pisang goreng) & kuihs, that we make time for on some afternoons in between seeing patients.
As the deer panteth for the water so Nana's soul longs for the playground.
At a tender young age Nana knew what she wanted to play and try to reach for it.
Papa, aren't you gonna help me up this swing? I don't know who vandalized it.
The hospital compound was relatively wide and neatly maintained. It was always peaceful and serene with the occasional ambulance siren fading from the distance. The tar road soon became my running tracks to train for competitions. Other than that there was a nice small playground, with hardly any kids around every time Nana goes there. Perhaps time has changed so drastically that most kids are content with their tablets and game apps at home.
The 1st time we brought Nana to the playground, we couldn't helped but notice she felt a little lonely without any kids to play with. We have seen the way she looked longingly at other children play, yearning to join in and be part of the fun. Me and Karling would try to liven Nana's spirit by playing with her, goofing around, encouraged and cheer her on as she tried new stuffs. Retrospectively, seeing her advanced from standing on her own 2 feet not too long ago, to running steadily at the playground, gives me mixed feelings dreading the day my little butterfly will fly off from my grasp.
Huuhh..I sure hope there are some other kids to play with me..
Then me leh?
But you're not cool enough papa..
Oooh.
Mami I wish you can smoulder me everyday, because you take my breath away.
Mother and daughter bonding is like the ocean caressing the seabed.
In Peter's absence, we spent a lot of time with Nana, giving her our undivided attention. You could say it was well deserved, after all she must have felt pretty neglected during Peter's neonatal period. Nana was our 1st born and will forever be my 1st love, after my 1st love that is. She doesn't typically strike a physical resemblance to either 1 of us, well maybe closer to me, but she potrays the best of both worlds in terms of character. More to come...
Most nights after work, Nana would join us for dinner. After that Karling & I would roll back the years and play with Nana like children. She is an energy ball of animation, cuteness & good sport all rolled into 1. By the end of play time, Mami had to coaxed Nana to sleep even after a bottle of milk as we were both tired and spent. At this age she still wasn't amused with her full box of toys and would rather enjoy herself sticking to us.
Mami, I will never stop loving you even if Peter is no.1 and I'm no.2
My 1st love and my 1st love (after my 1st love). At Midvalley fountain.
Now, its time to bring back Peter. After 2 months being acclimatize with BSJ, and Nana getting lonelier by the days, we were looking forward to October when the babysitter would be ready for him. On the last weekend of September, we set out on a "rescue mission" to retrieve Peter from his grandparents. Honestly speaking we were rescuing Karling's parents from our beloved son. It would be a heavy burden lifted off their poor shoulders and spine. Come to think of it, I was starting to worry how would that frail skinny babysitter handle our 2 kids all by herself?
We made a short trip to Nandos at Midvalley for dinner. Even during the 2 years living in Seremban, Nana could count the times me and Mami dated at Kuala Lumpur with a palm. Being not in the mood to spend, window shopping ended in a jiffy and it was on to dinner eating spicy Mexican chicken with big fat fries. The last time Nana came here was exactly 1 year ago, to celebrate my birthday. As time passed, Nana's pleasant evening might soon come to a rude halt, for she was going to confront her fierce competition.
Haha. Hi there, it is me, Nana's competititon.
Peter, you have grown so chubby. So much formula milk, Mami's milk not good enough?
I'm so "geram" to see you Peterboy (p.s. geram= can't take your cuteness).
Peter appeared chubby and fair, though his skin was tanner compared to Nana's. This boy instantly recognized us all, smiling in excitement squealing with delight, or probably he didn't know stranger anxiety. I supposed Mami was the happiest to see Peter, squeezing her cheek into his and hugging him tightly. Peter was taken care of like a prince, clearly well-nourished, healthy and cheerful. On the other hand the grandparents appeared drained nonetheless relieved to see us.
Nana, stamped in her true class again, not making any fuss whatsoever when she saw Mami giving a lot of affection to Peter. She observed discreetly from the sideline while the grandparents attempted to draw her attention. Nana knew her days of exclusiveness with us had ended and couldn't possibly deduce any disguised blessings that could come out of it. Little did she knew then, Peter and her would soon become close siblings-fierce rivals-best friends, the envy of other children and parents.
Mami looked very distracted with Peter, while Po po trying to catch up with her. A dutiful mother who despite being tired was concerned over her daughter.
Nana: ...........(sigh)
Peter: Hello jie jie, wanna play with me?
Nana: ............ *_*"
I'm coming home, tell the world i'm coming home~
Looking back at those times we had only Nana, when we were young parents back then, taught me how much to value a child every single day, because they grow up very fast. Its terrifying. Our children's innocent smile might one day turn into rebellious angst; their carefree life would be swallowed by the overwhelming demands of adolescence and adulthood. Worst, their fragile life might even be called to return home before they bury us.
I thank God I was there to witness both their birth. I cherish hearing Nana called "papa" for the 1st time, seeing her crawled to stand then took her baby steps towards me, can't stop smiling as I reminisces the 1st time she put on a dress, when she babbled away during our playtime, the way she smiled so wide when she got her 1st taste of porridge, also sobbing uncontrollably as I pat her to sleep on nights Mami was working.
Now that I'm a father, personally I realized there's no greater calling than this. I'm gonna continue to be close to Nana & Peter to capture some more important memories, for in them I've found my paradise on earth.
How To Play With Your Toddler
